In Search of a Tacky Housewarming Gift

A friend from work is having a house-warming party this evening. “Admission” to the party is a tacky house-warming gift. The tackiest gift gets a prize, according to the invitation. I wasn’t sure what I’d bring. I thought of the cow jigsaw puzzle in my basement storage room. The one I’d been carrying around for 11 years. It’s circular. It’s Holstein cows (you know, the black and white ones). It’s printed on both sides. It has 800 pieces. I’ve never opened it. This seemed like a golden opportunity to get rid of the damn thing.

Until this morning’s visit to some neighborhood garage sales. I made quite a haul of tackiness. First, there was the “miniature Americana” pots and pans set. Consists of a 5 inch long rack with little golden hooks to hang the little copper kettles and pans. Only 25 cents. Then there was the book “Uppity Women of the Middle Ages”. Got that for free. And of course, the 6 inch high snow person, with vest, made out of yarn, wrapped around three Styrofoam spheres. Ah, but saving the worst for last, for only 25 cents, a small conch shell with spikes, that hangs from a little brass stand with a hook. Inside the shell are little pink roses, with little pink beads and all tied up with little pink ribbons.

I’ll save the cow puzzle for another purpose. And I know JUST the person for “Uppity Women of the Middle Ages”.. I think the hanging shell will take the prize, whatever it is.. Tune in tomorrow for results!