Top 10 questions I've been asked as a Veterinarian!

I've been a veterinarian for 13 years. I've worn a lot of "hats". Dairy vet, emergency vet, housecall vet and a brief stint as a monkey vet. Now I'm a veterinary pathologist. So I get asked a lot of questions. Amazingly, I know the answers to some of them! Here are some of my favorites!


1) Why do dogs eat grass?

2) Why do dogs eat poop? (and the related question: what can I do about it?)

3) Is my cat/dog fat?

4) My dog pees/poops/chews up the rug when I leave for work/don't let him watch the Packers/etc. Is he angry with me?

5) Need some light? (said as I'm expressing a dogs anal glands)?

6) Can you teach me to do that (express anal glands)? This is always asked BEFORE I actually do the deed. The question is NEVER repeated when I am through.

7) How big will my puppy be when he's an adult?

8) How long will my dog live?

9) So, Doc, what breeds do you see in my dog?

10) My personal favorite: Doc, isn't it true that the longer my dog keeps his testicles, the more muscular he'll get?

I can't recall learning the answers to these questions in SCHOOL. Maybe I was sleeping........

Disclaimer: That is not actually me in the illustration above. Click on illustration to enlarge.